Eight games in the conference in week two, as Oregon State has a much-needed bye before hosting Louisville next week, and Stanford opens conference play by traveling to the Rose Bowl to face struggling UCLA.
Last week The Duck Stops Here was a perfect 10-0 in picking winners. Ted Miller of ESPN went a meager 7-3, and he doesn't have a day job.
Two caveats about predictions: first, they don't amount to a pile of dirty uniform socks. Predictions don't block or tackle and they don't punt or pass. We only do them because it's entertaining to speculate and enhances our anticipation and understanding of the coming games. Football games are decided by coaches and players, chiefly players, and in a few awful circumstances, officials, and what we say has a poor power to add or detract.
Second, anyone who bets on college football is a fool. The football is a funny shape, and is pointed at both ends. Not even an engineering whiz from Cal Tech has the slightest idea which way it will bounce next, and those guys gave up football thirty years ago. The Ducks had a magical season last year, but the drive to a conference championship turned on a field goal doinked off the crossbar, an errant snap hurriedly placed down, and a Beaver run over on the road to Pasadena. For all the planning, scheming, recruiting and prognosticating, there's a crucial five per cent of football that comes down to just dumb luck, and you have go better than 11-10 every week to beat the house.
So for amusement purposes only, these are this week's PAC-10 picks. All of these are home games, except Oregon vs. Tennessee which we will get to later this afternoon, and Stanford at the Rose Bowl, some say for their first of two trips:
Arizona 69, Citadel 13
The school that spawned writer Pat Conroy tuned up for this cross-sectional clash with the Wildcats by pasting Chowan 56-14, and next week they face Presbyterian. The glory years of the long gray line are long behind it. Nick Foles throws for four scores and has his helmet off by the middle of the second quarter. The girls swoon, and one drunk guy in row 53 says, "Hey, isn't that Tom Petty?"
Arizona State 51, Northern Arizona University 7
In the desert, you can't remember your name, and the Lumberjacks will be fuzzy on a few other details after being prodded repeatedly in the backside by the Sun Devil's pitchfork and Steven Threet's laser arm. ASU travels to number eleven Wisconsin next week, leaving the comfort of the confidence-boosting FCS for brats and a quick punch in the mouth. Week four finds them hosting Oregon.
Cal 41, Colorado 17
A soft early schedule gives Cal fans impetus to reconsider Kevin Riley with a visit to Nevada coming up next week, but they have road games to Arizona and USC in weeks four and six. By then the Bears will be back to their usual disgruntled, hibernating and underachieving selves.
Stanford 38, UCLA 6
Things get worse for the reeling Bruins. After giving up 234 yards to K-State's Daniel Thomas in their opening road loss, they face the Smash Mouth Cardinal, host Houston, then travel to number 5 Texas. It won't be pretty for Rick Neuheisel and UCLA, and despite his silver tongue, he'll rapidly run out of ways to spin it. Kevin Prince, his banged-up starting quarterback, was 9-26 passing for 120 yards last week. Improvement is not on the horizon. It's not even visible above the smog.
USC 58, Virginia 7
Blistered by their coaches all week in practice, the Trojan defense makes what is perceived as a statement versus the lowly Cavaliers. Virginia quarterback Marc Verica has been picked over for the job three times at the school, once losing it to the departed, troubled Peter Lalich, once to a converted cornerback running out of the Wildcat formation, and once to Jameel Sewell. Now he's the last comic standing, but the act isn't very funny. The Trojans have their way in this one and get to play the fight song incessantly. If Will Ferrell shows up he may get snaps in the fourth quarter.
Washington 38, Syracuse 24
The short-lived Jake Locker for Heisman campaign enjoys a brief revival in a romp over the Orangemen. Three teams in the PAC-10 are playing orange schools, or schools with orange in their color scheme. Orange is the new white, and Syracuse leaves Montlake feeling blue. Locker looks like a world beater in this one, but he has Nebraska and USC to follow, and his name will make fewer and fewer of those watch lists by week six.
WSU 27 Montana State 24
The Cougs need a late field goal to win it, and the narrow victory does nothing to relieve the grimness and impending doom in Pullman. Paul Wulff doesn't have enough players or enough time, and one victory in 2010 won't buy him more of either. If they shock the Huskies at the end of the year it might earn him a fourth year, but that's a storybook story likely to die a painful death in the fireswamp of PAC-10 play.
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